Dear Naughty Nonna,
There’s a lot of factors going on in my life that are just killing my libido. I’m stressed, I’m not getting enough sleep, and I have a partner who’s beginning to get frustrated with my lack of drive. For both our sakes, how can I get the ball rolling again?

Sincerely,
Dangerously Dried Up

Well Dried Up, two of my favorite words start with the letters FU and one is FUN and the other one can be as well!! There is a line between something you don’t want to do and something you want to do but for which you lack motivation. Don’t get me wrong, I would never suggest that someone do something they don’t want to do, but it sounds to me like you want to try and maintain your healthy sexual relationship.

Sex is nourishing for the soul. It can actually improve your sleep quality as well as your physical and mental health. In a healthy relationship sex is a stress reducer, so don’t let it be a stress causer. We all go through periods where we lack motivation and drive, but the old adage, “Fake it ‘til you make it” can really be beneficial here. Think of this as “The art of start.” Once you get started you’ll be glad you did. Sex shouldn’t be a chore. It’s a recreational activity.

Dear Naughty Nonna,
I want to try some new things in the bedroom with my girlfriend but I am not sure how to approach her with the idea. Can you offer some advice so that I don’t scare her away.

Sincerely,
Bashful in the bedroom

Dear Bashful,
Women everywhere applaud you for asking for help. It takes a strong person to ask for advice! There are lots of ways to spice things up in the bedroom, Bashful, and communication is the way to go. An easy way to open the conversation up would be asking your lady about her fantasies. She might also be bashful at first, but this is a great way to start. During your bedroom explorations, try a new position, or maybe try some role-playing ~ Leia and Han Solo, teacher and school girl, or French maid. Once you two are feeling a bit more relaxed, introducing toys can always add some adventure.

Never be afraid to experiment. Keep your sex life fresh and you will be rewarded over and over again!

Dear Naughty Nonna,
My boyfriend and I just broke up. It wasn’t too bad, but it’s still way too soon to go back to market. In the meantime, I’m dying for a little attention. I really don’t want to go around hooking up just because I need a booty call. Is it too desperate to get a vibrator? If it isn’t, do you have one you’d suggest? And finally, is it really creepy to order one online?

Sincerely,
Missing the Buzz

Dear Buzz,
Getting a vibrator is NEVER a bad idea. In another lifetime, I did home parties where I sold toys, lotions, potions, books and couples games. A great thing about these parties is the chance to ask questions about the products in a safe environment, as well as to get to actually see items out of the package, and get to feel the material of which they are made, and to see ahead of time how different settings on the toys work. Having your own party is a great way to check out the products out there.

That being said, not everyone is ready for one of these shin-digs, and online represents a great option. Personally, I believe it’s less creepy to order one online then to go to a store that might be unseemly. There are many different types of materials and styles of toys, and I’m not going to bore you with all the details. Suffice it to say, I prefer toys that get clean, really clean. Medical-grade silicone vibrators, and dildos made of glass are a couple of my favorites. Style is a whole nother ball game, there are vibes made specifically for clitoral stimulation, ones used for g-spot stimulation, and toys that are made for penetration. A website that has a large choice of items along with proven customer service and a commitment to their customers’ pleasure and health is the best way to go. I like www.goodvibes.com, in business since 1977, with a thriving web business as well as retail stores in the San Franscisco area and one in Brookline, Mass.
They recently launched a line focused on green ideals, using natural and organic materials.

If you feel ready to get some friends together for a fun “Girls’ Night Out,” try scheduling a party by going to www.passionparties.com. Have fun exploring and put the buzz back in your life!!

Naughty Nonna needs your submissions!!!

Letters to can be emailed to [email protected], dropped off in the Basement Medicine office, LLC 327, or, submitted online.

This column is for entertainment only. Any advice, guidance, or other information that you receive is not a substitute for advice, programs, or treatment that you would normally receive from a licensed professional such as a doctor or psychiatrist. If you have immediate concerns, please seek help from the Campus Heath Center at 635-1265 or call your physician. JSC’s Women Center in Dewey Hall also has a list of available resources and information. They are open from 1-5, Monday through Thursday.